Manic Motherhood at it's FINEST!!

Why "I am NOT a VOLCANO!"

Why "I am NOT a VOLCANO!"
click the volcano for the due explanation
"In all of living, have much fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured." — Gordon B. Hinckley
Exaggeration is the spice of life

Book I am Currently Reading: Peter and The Shadow Thief

Friday, February 12, 2010

Songs to get over, the irritating things my kids do, and all in favor of Valentines day.

I adore my children. And I think that goes without saying.

I can't really imagine myself with any different life.

You know, how there are all those breakup songs (and I can't STAND them, btw) about how so-and-so didn't give Mr/s. Bigtime-Now the time of day, or cheated on them, or broke up with them, or whatever the case may be.

Some examples include:

Best Days Of Your Life by Kellie Pickler

Gives You Hell by The All-American Rejects

How Do You Like Me Now by Toby Keith


You'll Think Of Me by Keith Urban

They all somehow think that the person who walked out on them is going to turn around someday and miss them because they've made such a terrible mistake leaving such a great, wonderful, and perfect person behind for someone else. The person singing the song, of course, will move on and find a wonderful person to be with. However, the person who left won't. They'll spend the next 80 years alone, fruitless, and wishing they had at least looked back. (Gives you hell, You'll think of me, Best days of your life.)

Some of them have 'moved on' themselves, only to be seemingly gloating in the song to that girl or boy back in high school who didn't know they existed. (How do you like me now, Skater boy)

Does this sound ridiculous to anyone else? I mean, sure, maybe for awhile, even a few years, the person might come to regret their actions, and I suppose that there ARE the few cases where the regret lasts a lifetime. But not usually.

I have been in my fair share of relationships and I know first hand that if a relationship falls apart, even if it is MOSTLY due to one person being an idiot, BOTH sides play a part.

I daresay that no, the person who stormed out on you for whatever reason (usually not mentioned in the song, but if it's for another wo/man, then first of all, I'd like to say that cheating is wrong. It's hurtful, and douchy outside of marriage, but I say that cheating outside of marriage doesn't a forever cheater make. It's not nice, and it's probably wrong, but I don't think it's a sin they're going to Hell for. Cheating IN the bounds of marriage is an unforgivable offense in my book, and that jerk had better not come crawling back. Ever.) probably WILL think of you from time to time, but I'm sure they won't pine for you for the rest of their lives. Yes, you'll move on. But after a mourning period, and maybe a rebound or two, they'll probably be able to be happy and build a life with someone else too.

If it is a song about a person who dissed you unknowingly or even obviously and blatantly to their delight in high school, then I think you're probably kidding yourself when you ask the question "How do you like me now?" or when you sing about some 'popular' little ballerina girl who was just too shy to step up and kiss the boy.

In the first situation, I think maybe Mr. Toby Keith (who I don't tend to like much anyway) needs to move on himself. You're like, what? 40 now? Wow! You're a huge star! Beyond that, I doubt the girl whose name and phone number you painted on the football field with a note underneath that said "call for a good time" is going to like you any more than she did in high school. If you liked HER, you probably should have asked her to prom instead of giving her number to the entire school and hillbilly rednecks who proceeded to stalk. If she even recognizes your name at all, it's probably only to vaguely remember that you might have gone to her school, and weren't you that dick head who made her life miserable?

And you, miss Avril Lavigne, I know the song is made up and all, because instead of there being a Skater boy up on stage (or on cars, rather, as that is what's in your video) rocking the night away, it's you. So if it's just a 'fun', rhetorical song, then that's fine- I'm a writer. I write rhetorical stuff all the time. But I'd still like to address it. Just rhetorically. If you, the new girlfriend, who has such a wonderful and close bond with your new found boy toy, is singing this song, then why in the world would you be singing a 'Neener Neener' song to a girl you A. Don't know and B. Lost her chance? Because if you know about her in so much detail that you're singing to her, it probably means that Mr. Perfect still talks about her. A lot. And it probably means that you have an inferiority complex, and want to tell her to back off because you're afraid that she still wants him too. Also, you mention in the song that "she's feeding the baby she's all alone." - well, first off, how would you know that? Stalker much? And second, I have a baby. I have 3. I'm not alone. The sheer fact that I HAVE them kind of implies that I'm not alone. So, again, we're back to the moving on stage. Who says that because she was so shy (or so judgemental) that she didn't physically return a crush in high school she didn't move on and marry a man of her dreams, have a baby and live happily ever after? Just wondering.

If this song is actually YOU being the rockin' out skater boy, but it's flipped around so that it's not obvious (but it is) that it's YOU, then please refer to my Toby Keith lecture above.

My point is, that no, I don't think or wish that my past boyfriends wish they were with me still. Maybe they think of me with (hopefully) fond memories, but I don't think I'm the subject of an every day pity party. I know that when I think of them, beyond smiling for a moment to myself with thankfulness that I had the experience, I only go on to thank my lucky stars that I ended up where I am at and not where I was headed.

My children annoy me to no end. (Yes, it's a sharp turn here, but stay with me. I'm making a point.) I have found that no matter how relentlessly I love them, some days I spend just waiting for nap time, preschool time, and bedtime so that I can have ten minutes to just read a whole paragraph of a book, or surf the internet without having to get a drink for someone.

Please don't start flaming yet. Many more days are spent reading books, playing outside, coloring, and I find that I miss them immensely when they are asleep or when Brandon and I get a much deserved night out on the town without them.

But seriously, they all have their little quirks that just irk me (and isn't that funny that the word 'irk' is IN the work 'quirk'? Like it's SUPPOSED to be obnoxious?)

Lilly has a knack for always finding things that are mine and bringing them to me. This might sound helpful, except that she brings them to me from a drawer, a closet, a shelf, or even the counter, where I've left it just because that's where i put it down. She brings me things that are put away already. Things I don't need. She will get into my drawer in the kitchen that contains all the pencils and cards and sometimes my drivers licence. She'll look in there, find my ID and bring it to me. Several times a day- my cell phone, a pair of shoes from my closet, a couple of pennies off of my dresser. I know, she's just trying to help, so i usually just say thank you.

Mahone has a knack for stepping on anything and everything. And I don't mean on purpose. The child is like a clutter magnet. Toys, books, tables - if it's on the floor, he steps on it. There can be a big old empty room, and a small pile of books in the middle of it. Somehow, he will trip over them. It's not that he's trying. He just doesn't see it.

Scarlet- yes, well, Scarlet, I think, is only irritating because she's little. She does all the irritating things all kids do. Like touch things she KNOWS she's not supposed to, while I tell her no-no, and she smiles and does it anyway, looking me in the eye the whole time.

The point of the matter is, I wouldn't change my life for anything. I have never wanted to hide or run away, or change it. I never wonder what if I didn't have them, or what if i ended up married to someone else, or what if I were still single. I am stressed out sometimes, and I am not always wonderful at controlling it. I yell, I get frustrated. I make mistakes and say things i should not. But still, I love them. I cannot live without them. And I want more of them. My life will always be blessed because of them.

To everyone else- love the ones you have. Life is short, and sometimes, unexpected things happen. Don't look back. Don't wonder. Don't pine. Just love unconditionally. I have learned this several times in the last year. I have seen it several times in only the short month i have been blogging.

Natalie's angel Gavin

Sara's sweet miracle Bronson, who is home now.

My mom and dad a year ago.

My dearest Scarlet who defied all odds 5 months ago.

And many many more I read about every day. Just don't look back.


Sherri said...

I hardly ever get a chance to read a long blog...but this morning I got up super early..all the kids asleep..and there was your post!
Thank you!
I believe in embracing every minute also...thanks for the reminder!
You are a Wonderful mom!

Christina said...

i can relate. i so know what you mean, some days you just need them to go to bed. I just have one, too! You dont have to explain yourself, its completely normal and acceptable to feel tired and exahausted and crave time by yourself. You are craving an hour, for them to take a nap.

I laughed at that avril lavigne analyzation because i thought the exact same things. Hahahahah.

Stuff could always be worse said...

Yes I believe in the real meaning of love and embrace every minute is a good reminder for me.

Andrea said...

I didn't think about the irk in quirk hahaha

Christine:) said...

I love your analysis of the songs:)
Beautiful ending- I also can empathize- days when I can't even go to the bathroom because each time I put a child down, he/she screams to no end, I get images of the other moms out there who have kids in the hospital, etc., and it just puts things into perspective for me, and then I honestly don't mind that my bladder is bursting while I am snuggling my kids. :)

Joyce from MBC * will follow back * said...

Kids are so much fun! Mine used to sing the same Barney song for hours. I miss that.

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