Manic Motherhood at it's FINEST!!

Why "I am NOT a VOLCANO!"

Why "I am NOT a VOLCANO!"
click the volcano for the due explanation
"In all of living, have much fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured." — Gordon B. Hinckley
Exaggeration is the spice of life

Book I am Currently Reading: Peter and The Shadow Thief

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Brag & Blab and Not Me Monday

Mckmama- Not Me Monday


I did NOT break out my maternity clothes because I am already too fat to fit into my regular jeans. Yes, they are big...but SOOOO much more comfortable than squeezing into something so tight that you look like a muffin.
I did NOT let my kids have lemonade girl scout cookies and milk for breakfast.
I did NOT bawl my eyes out at church (pregnancy hormones on the fritz) during primary when all the kids were singing the mother's day song they sang last week and both my kids turned to look at me, wave, and blow kisses.
I did NOT also almost fall asleep later that hour, and have to get up and walk around the church to keep from nodding off.
I am NOT feeling insecure about my baby because I am not yet feeling sick .


You know how this works, my friends!!! Use this button to link back to me, link up, and then brag about something wonderful, and blab about something that sucks!

Brag: I got to spend the evening with Brandon's mom and dad and their kids last night. it was AWESOME! We love them so very much. I was sad to leave because we were having so much fun!!!!

Blab: Well, I wasn't going to sink to their level, but this is the crappiest thing that has happened in a long time.

You know how I used to write a fairy story on Saturdays for my 'other' blog (thegossamerjewelbox)- that one? Well, I've never really been shy about the kind of big dork I am, and that I LOVE to take pictures of fairies. YES, I do do some mainstream stuff- I have some really excellent (I think) pictures of my kids- portrait style- but really, I just like the hobby of it. Never have I proclaimed myself a professional, or even 'good' at it. I just LIKE it. It's a hobby. It was fun for me. I have never had any classes and I'm teaching myself to use photo shop, so I know I have a lot to learn. But I always figured that you have to start SOMEWHERE, and no one was ever good when they were beginning.

Well, on Friday, after two days of waiting through their 2 day 'waiting period' (lest, heaven forbid, they get a spammer) I was finally able to join the January 2011 birth board- which is why I joined http://www.thebump.com/ in the first place. It's an okay board, but it's slow. So I branched out and visited boards like "SAHM's" and "Preschoolers" and "Photography"

The "Photography" board was an absolute mistake because within 10 minutes of posting about my interest in photography, and the kind of photography I like to do, I was made fun of and had at least 2 other threads started with the explicit goal of demeaning me, my blog, and my hobby.

So I deleted the link.

Those who had already been there passed it around and started making mocking pictures of their babies with goat horns on their heads.

They lectured me about how my photography is no good. And it just went on and on.

My gossamer jewel box blog received over 500 hits that day from this site, and they continued to not only bash my pictures, but also to bash my writing and talk about how I abuse my dog.

So I had to set it to private.

Maybe one day- years from now, I will no longer have that blog private. But in the mean time, it's my own space. I am no longer so confident, now, in the possibility that someday I'll be 'pretty good' - which is what I was aiming for.


Still, I love it. I LOVE making wings and dressing my kids up and playing with photo shop. Even if I need a lot of education on the subject. So, even though my dignity has been crushed, I'm going to refuse to stop playing.


If you would like to check out the hateful things they said, please do at these links. All I wanted was to maybe receive some pointers, talk about styles, and maybe get some tutorials about photo shop. Stupid me. (Oh, and notice- I have 3 posts in TOTAL. And none of them were rude in the slightest.)


http://community.thenest.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/36703585.aspx
http://community.thenest.com/cs/ks/forums/36725668/ShowThread.aspx#36725668
http://community.thenest.com/cs/ks/forums/36717589/ShowThread.aspx#36717589
BTW, I am USUALLY totally up for other people's comments, whether the agree or disagree. And I don't care if people like my style or not. I realize that I'm a little strange and that my ideas are- for lack of a better word- weird. I'm cool with people disagreeing. I have never been one to want people to give me false praise or blow sunshine up my skirt, or pee rainbows or any of those other chat board phrases for 'brown nosing'. It might come from years upon years of creative writing classes- but criticism is good. I like criticism- especially the constructive kind. But I'm not okay with personal attacks, and I can honestly say that I have never in my whole life been involved in something this lacking in tact or basis, nor have I ever tried to hurt someone or diminish their importance the way these GROWN WOMEN have tried to do to me. (It makes me wonder who these women think they are, acting all high and mighty. Who taught them EVERYTHING, and forgot to teach them respect, tolerance, and love? It makes me sad for their children, because I know that MY children will be dealing with THEIR children when they grow up. And that is a depressing thought.)

Forgive me when I say that right now, my pride is completely shattered- and I'm perfectly okay if you looked at my Gossamer Jewel Box blog once upon a time, and thought it was crap. I very sincerely respect differences in opinion. But I'm not posting, nor reading, any comment that may attack me here. I have it under pretty good authority that they found THIS blog while searching for it on google.com after I set it to private. So if any of them have anything demeaning or negative to say to me, it'll be deleted before anyone else has a chance to see it. Because after I slander their names all over my blog, their value is gone.






13 comments:

Jess said...

Let me just say, I feel for you. I belong to several BabyCenter blogs... and people get attacked, bashed, and ostracized all the time there. For the littlest things. You actually piqued my interest- I think unique photography is great. After all, it's something you're interested in. Something that not many other people might be. Oh well, who cares? I say keep on doing whatever makes you happy! :) Hobbies are just that- HOBBIES. And, if someday you get to take this somehow professionally, awesome! :)

Jess said...

Ooops. I meant babycenter GROUPS. Sorry, blogs on my mind.

Beth said...

That is truly awful! So sorry you were subjected to that! Not sure why some people think it makes them look better to tear another down. I think it's just proof that they are mean little people to begin with! Good for you for not letting them steal the joy you find in your hobby!

Serene is my name, not my life! said...

Wow, that was pretty bad. I'm so sorry.
I never really understand how some people have so much extra time on their hands the only thing they can do with it is make fun of others.

You're right, there is a huge difference between disagreeing, and bashing.

Do what you love! And hang everyone else.

leaner said...

People are soooo mean sometimes. BTW, I love your photos. I didn't think they were lame or anything. I'm sorry you have to deal with that negativity.

Mimi said...

I went and read those comments Brae... and couldn't believe how mean they were being. I am glad you took away their opportunity to try to degrade you anymore. We are all at different places on the path of life and what matters is not how good we are at anything but that we are progressing and bettering ourselves in whatever we are doing. We should all remember that before we speak.
Oh, I don't if you know but you can set your comments to be approved before they will post onto your page. It's a little more work for you but then you can keep the nasties away. I use it on my blog and when someone comments it just sends me an email so I can approve or deny it.
Anyway, we love you at the Hancock House

Rachel said...

Brae, those women are the kind who give the rest of us a bad name. I'm a photographer with my own business and I think your photos are great! You have awesome ideas and if those people are too narrow-minded to see that different can be good then it's their loss. I sooo want a pair of your wings for my daughter, I don't know if she's too small though because she only weighs 6 pounds.

Lindsey said...

Brae, I love you! It's amazing the lengths that people will go to to disguise their own insecurities. I think you are wonderful and I would love to keep up with your unique and fun Gossmer Jewel Box Blog (I think you have my e-mail) I'm not going to say not to let this get you down, because obviously it has and I don't blame you, but don't let it keep you down. Love, love, love you, cousin!!

Lourie said...

I bet they would never have the guts to say or do something even remotely close to that in person. So wrong.

BTW, I have enjoyed the pictures you have shared. And I must say learning photoshop on your own is very brave. I would be LOST!

esianoyam3 said...

Wow, those are some really nasty, mean comments. I'm sorry you had to deal with that - it makes the rest of us who are actually trying to BE professionals look very mean and petty.

Professional photography is an INCREDIBLY difficult market to be in these days. Those of us who have spent YEARS developing our skills and client bases are struggling because there are thousands of start-up photography businesses undercutting and devaluing the market. It makes it frustrating to do simple things like getting on Facebook because every day I see yet another friend or "friend of friend" mentioning that they're now charging for portraits. Too many people are jumping into the industry charging painfully low rates for sub-par work. So really, a lot of professional photographers are on edge these days, and we get defensive pretty quickly.

Maybe the ladies who viewed your blog came across this blog where you've mentioned that you're going to be offering paid fairy portraits. I know you consider yourself a hobbyist, BUT, if they came across this blog and saw that post, I can kind of see where they might have seen the original post as some form of advertisement.

That being said, what the ladies on that forum did to you was SO wrong. It was unprofessional and downright mean, and it makes me so angry for you. If they're feeling insecure, they should spend time improving and making their work stand out from the crowd rather than devoting hours to belittling somebody who was simply trying to reach out and make friends with women who share a similar interest.

Yankee Girl ~ Missy said...

WOW - speechless.

Sorry you had such a bad week.

Jb said...

That is so baffling why people have to be so mean...and to someone they don't even know! What is up with THAT?!
I would love to see your pics! I hope you'll feel like you can make them public again!
What Mimi said is a good idea. Also, see if you can mark them as spam.
AND...copy their IP address and go permanently block them through your cPanel. (My son gives brief instructions on how to do this http://computerwiz.homemakerspensieve.com/untitled/index.html).
(Please forgive his spelling errors. Spelling is not his forte...computers are).

Mama Louie said...

I hope you do continue to enjoy your hobby! And for what it's worth I think you're already pretty good. Maybe not everyone will like your particular niche, but it's what you love so do it. There are others who appreciate it. You have your own style, creativity, and diy attitude. Techniques are the easiest thing to learn if you have the others. How many people out there are technically proficient but have no creativity or a style that sets them apart? A lot. And you already have that. Give yourself a pat on the back.

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