Not Me Monday- through the years.

In kindergarten, I did NOT get in a fist fight with a boy twice my size because he kept flipping my skirt up. I did NOT win. (It also did NOT have anything to do with a solitary white chair in a sea of brown ones that I always wanted and so did he.) In FIRST grade, I did NOT get into trouble because I did NOT call two boys 'booger butts' because they were NOT calling my Native-American friend 'Chocolate person.' (they actually, for real, did not get into trouble. I was REALLY upset about this.) In SECOND grade, on the day back from being off track, I did NOT chase every single boy down and kiss them.In THIRD grade, I did NOT kick a boy, Frank, in the teeth because he did NOT keep crawling under the desk and kissing my knees. I also did NOT get into trouble because my 3 best friends and I did NOT throw mud balls at the portable (which was our classroom) and we did NOT have to miss an awards ceremony to clean it up. For YEARS afterwords, my best friend's mom did NOT lecture us about it every time we were together.In FOURTH grade, I did NOT bite the girl who sat next to me (Alicia) on the elbow because she would purposely lean over and stick it on my desk. In FIFTH grade, I did NOT have a teacher tell me there was no Santa Clause because she felt I was too old to believe such things. She also did NOT tell me that I should run away and never come back. She also did NOT make fun of me, and my best friends Brad, Rey, and Jake (all boys) at the time, telling the whole class how she saw all of them kissing me, which was absolutely, for really real, not true- we spent all of our time on the swings, and they were for really real, not my boyfriends. And when I was in Fifth grade, my BROTHER was in SECOND grade- and he did NOT change his appearance each day so that he could sneak through the lunch line several times. (Bottomless pit, that one. LOL.) In SIXTH grade, I was NOT an absolute looser with no friends because I switched from D track (where I'd been all my life) to A track, where the rich, spoiled, 'popular' class was, and I was NOT dirt under their feet.