Manic Motherhood at it's FINEST!!

Why "I am NOT a VOLCANO!"

Why "I am NOT a VOLCANO!"
click the volcano for the due explanation
"In all of living, have much fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured." — Gordon B. Hinckley
Exaggeration is the spice of life

Book I am Currently Reading: Peter and The Shadow Thief

Thursday, April 1, 2010

MY NEW MEME, Feel Good Friday, and Letters of Intent

(For Feel Good Friday and Letters of Intent, please scroll down. Before I get to that, I'm going to announce my new MEME!!!!!!!)

My new Meme!

I'm very excited to announce "Brag & Blab Mondays"

I have, for a long time, wanted to host my own meme, complete with a Mr. Linky and everything. And I have wracked my brain trying to think of a topic that everyone can relate to, that everyone can do, and something that they would want to do.

Okay, so if you know me at all, you know that I'm a total attention diva. I hog the spotlight. Or try to.

If you know me at all, you know that I am also a huge bawl bag. I complain about everything. I know. Negativity is soooo not becoming. Technically, bragging and gossiping are never in style...but here, on I am NOT a VOLCANO, Mondays showcase an awesome fashion show for the proud and sharp tongued!!!!

Yes, I know. I'm ahead of myself. It's Friday. Not Monday- but I'm bringing it up now to let you get a head start.

First things first: GRAB THIS BUTTON FOR YOUR POST!!! (also available on my left sidebar)

Step two: BRAG!!!

Okay, I need to clarify. This isn't your regular "I'm happy because...." post. This isn't your run of the mill "My kids are so cute because...." post.

No, no, no, this is a blatant "I'm BETTER THAN YOU BECAUSE...." post. You can brag about something you did, how you look, what your child did, how your hubby is so awesome, etc. It doesn't matter. But it HAS to be actual BRAGGING.

Step three: BLAB!!!

Spill it, sister! Give us the dirt, the dish, the scoop, KISS AND TELL! I wanna hear your complaints, your gossip, who did what, and why your mom or mother in law is so awful!!!

(I know. Satan is clearing out a room for me in Hell.)

Now, I know a lot of us have family members or friends who read our blogs and you don't want to dish the dirt on them here. That's fine! I'll settle for a pity party about how your weekend sucked or you wish you had more money, or you hate the color of your car. Fine with me!!!

I hope you all participate! I PROMISE to leave comments for everyone who links up! Hopefully, you all find this fun enough to come and play!

Feel Good Friday!!!!

Five things that are making me happy:

1. Tomorrow, I get to go take Amazon Warrior Princess pictures with two of my very very good friends! If you know anything about me at all, you know how excellently superb this is to me. I LOVE dressing up, putting on war paint, and taking pictures. It's awesome.

2. I am not kidding. I am physically FIGHTING the urge to pee on a stick (pregnancy test)- I can't possibly get a positive until like Monday or something, but I am really feeling like this is THE month!!

3. FINALLY, I think we've made some headway with the military and the ability to get our children's complete shot records. HOORAY!

4. Conference is coming up this weekend. For those of you who are not LDS, Conference happens in April and October. It is so wonderful- when our Prophet and the apostles, and other important people at the head of our church speak at the Conference Center in Salt Lake City, and it's broadcast all over the whole world. I always love conference, and I look forward to it immensely. If you'd like more information, check it out further, or watch it this Sunday (10.00-12.00 for the morning session and 2:00-4:00 for the afternoon session.) go to

5. Easter Sunday is on Conference Sunday this year! That's so awesome because it means my kids can do Easter egg hunts and eat their candy at home instead of whine through church because they want to go home and eat their Easter candy.


Dear So and So...

Dear Utah Drivers,

Please, PLEASE, for the love of all that is holy, figure out how to use such things as left turn lanes, roundabouts and blinkers.

See, whoever it was that invented traffic laws, well, let's just say that they were smarter than you are.

A turn lane, for example, makes it possible for you to turn left without having to slow down in the middle of the street and slow down the traffic behind you. If I had a nickle for every driver who slowed down before getting into the turn lane, I'd be rich. And if I had a penny for every driver who forgot about the turn lane altogether until the very last possible moment and came to near stopping before getting in the turn lane, I'd be a millionaire. PEOPLE: No one behind you should EVER have to slow down if there is a turn lane.

Roundabouts are just as bad. Friends, a roundabout is NOT a FOUR-WAY-STOP. The whole point of a roundabout is so that you DON'T have to stop at all! I mean, by all means, YIELD, but there should not have to be 6 or 7 cars lined up behind you to get into a roundabout because all the drivers on all sides of the roundabout are treating it as though it's a four way stop. Seriously, people? It's a good thing you do not live in New Jersey. I think your heads would explode at the thought of a jug handle. (For those who are reading this and don't know what I"m talking about- it's when you overshoot the left turn you want to take, and turn right onto a one way road which flips you around- as in, you drive in a half circle- nothing actually FLIPS you around- and then drive straight through a light onto said left turn instead of hanging an actual left....oh, did I hurt your poor head???)

Last but not least: Blinkers. Yeah, those blinky lights aren't meant to be pretty, they are meant to communicate your next line of action to people who are behind you or who are headed toward you on the opposite side of the road. If I am sitting at a stop sign, ready to turn, and you do not have your blinker on, I am going to assume that you are going to keep going straight, that it is your right-of-way and that I need to wait my turn (remember that lesson in preschool?). If I am sitting there, as you come down the road, waiting patiently like MY mommy taught me, and, instead of going straight, as your lack of a blinker is indicating, you turn down the street I'm on and go past me, well, then you've just wasted my precious time. (And yes, my time IS more valuable than yours. I'm a mom of 3. So eat that.)

I think it would be a good idea for all Utah drivers to study up on the rules of the road. I have.


They Drive Better In Texas.


Foursons said...

Are you sure we drive better in TX?

We have a roundabout in my town and when I was a teenager we used to trap the tourists in the middle lane.

Blinkers are not bling for my car? Huh. Who knew?

Thanks for linking up!

I'm NOT a VOLCANO! said...

LOL- well, at least you were misusing the roundabout on purpous! You'd be surprised at the people who lose like 10 IQ points when faced with one here. LOL.

The JAMC Johnsons said...

I know, they do drive better in Texas! I drove for years in Texas with minimal issues. Now that I'm in AZ, I feel like I'm going to blow my top every time I'm on the road!

the Spocks said...

Having never been to Utah, are you sure we drive better?? There was a accident outside of town yesterday five kids ejected something tell me she was not using a turn signal or being a defensive driver. Then there is Dallas traffic-they can't drive at all.

I'm NOT a VOLCANO! said...

LOL- well, I don't think ther is a PERFECT place to drive, but I can tell you that I've driven all over this country moving for the military, and Texas gave me the least trouble. LOL.

Hope those kids were okay.

Stacey said...

LOL So very true!! And they drive better in Salt lake county than in Utah county. I swear there is an invisible shield at the point of the mountain that turns drivers into morons!!

Anonymous said...

Remeber, Will is now driving in Texas!
Love Aunt Uber

Anonymous said...

Oh those roundabouts! You'd think it required some kind of degree in rocket science to make it around one. What really (like really really) drives me crazy are the people who have no clue what to do so they just sit there. Confused. And let everyone else go. Makes me want to walk up & push their car thru it just so I can go :P

J.B. said...

Have your best Easter ever.

Lourie said...

I think there are bad drivers everywhere. We have red light runners out here. In VA, if you didn't hit the gas the very second the light turned green you got honked at.

The Girl Next Door Grows Up said...

Congrats on your first Meme!! I think it sounds really fun! Also, I hope that you get the results you want on Monday!!! You have a lot of patience - I couldn't wait!

Shmonae said...

SO Freaking funny AND you beat me to it! I want to start one also but haven't decided what! I am sure yours will be a hit and so funny to read! Hmm, now the heat is on..I gotta come up with mine! So here's my first complaint!! You have a Meme and I don't! You STINK!

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